I’m still on level ground, so the last thing I should be doing is looking up at the top of the mountain to be reminded how daunting the climb. I should not be reminding myself that the process of getting from point A to point B is fraught with doubt, indecision, fear and the insatiable need to eat chocolate.  Mostly I should not be focused on the what if’s because having reached the summit nine times already, I know that the journey is difficult enough without weighing myself down with a heavy burden.

Am I talking about scaling Mount Everest? Might as well be. I’m speaking of writing a new novel, which, frankly  is just as scary. And yet, like a climber who is repelling down the mountain and already thinking ahead to the next challenge, writers also never stop thinking about their next conquest.For me, the process begins with a character. I won’t be be able to take that first step without her.

When readers ask what my books are about, I suggest that the better question is, who are my books about. Basically, no matter what happens in the story, if the character’s aren’t memorable and compelling, if they’re not as true and troubled as the people we know, and mostly if they’re not remarkable in the face of adversity, no one will care if they’re dangling from a mountain with a skinny rope that was made in China for Wal Mart.

So here I am, at the auspicious beginning of the trek, wondering about my new protagonist. I’ve named her Margot Paley, or maybe Von Paley, and I’m wondering/hoping she’ll intrigue me enough to keep me up nights as did her four fictional sisters, Shelby Lazarus, Claire Green, Robyn Fortune and Mindy Sherman…  they sound like they joined the same sorority, right?

Anyway,  in between emptying the dishwasher and folding towels,  I am creating a vision of who my companion will be on this trek- where she is from, how  she was raised, what she worried about in sixth grade that is still plaguing her, what she dreamed of her whole life that is still eluding her and who or what is stopping her, who she loves, how she loves, what she is good at and what are her fatal flaws.

Here is what I know so far about both Margot and her husband Mark, or maybe Henry. There are no villains in their story, only lost, misguided souls who were so sure they had set out on the right path, only to discover that they took a very wrong turn and have no idea how to get back. Margot is a plodder and a planner- she has always known what she wanted, and when she married Mark/Henry, felt like she was safe at home plate.  She could have her career, a family, a beautiful home, and be the envy of her single sisters who were still in the dugout, busting to be the next at bat. Mark/Henry, a handsome catch, grew up in a home where everything was done for appearances sake. He will do anything to protect the image that he is a success like his father. He will drive the right car, own the right suits, entertain the right clients, join the right country club…

Or maybe I’ll call them Toby and Glenn, and they’ll be a Rabbi and a Cantor at a Temple in New Jersey who take their kids sky diving on Shabbat.

This is the fun part. The shaping and reshaping. The thinking of all the what if’s. The pondering about what demons lie beneath the surface because they are most certainly there. There are no right or wrong ideas at this point, just the ones that make it through to the next level because they make me think, laugh, worry and even cry.

Margot and Henry we hardly knew yee? Stay tuned. I’m just getting warmed up.